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Map your course, not theirs.

“Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong.  There are always difficulties arising which tempt you to believe that your critics are right.  To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires…courage.”   –Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Your network, is your net worth.  I head this phrase recently from Bob Beaudine, author of The Power of Who, and it stuck with me.  I have a finance background and was taught the math way to measure the net worth of a person. You take their total assets (home, vehicles, valuable belongings) and subtract their total liabilities (home mortgage, car loans, credit card debt, school loans, any other loans). The higher the assets than the liabilities, the higher the net worth. That is the way to measure a person’s financial net worth. However, there is another net worth too.

When I find a particularly interesting and successful person, I like to research their background.  I’m curious as to how they got to be where they are.  How much time did they put in to hone their skill and craft?  Who helped them along the way? Did they come from a healthy family upbringing, or a troubled one? What I’ve noticed is regardless as to how they were brought up, they have surrounded themselves with a lot of high energy, talented, positive people. They collaborate with these people on a regular and consistent basis and over time they’ve built trust and good friendships – a solid network.  You could say they’ve achieved a high net worth because of their network. I’m now putting more effort into building my network of trusted friends and am excited to see where it takes me. How about you?  What is your net worth?

network-is-networth

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Happy Valentine’s Day.  Let’s all love like this.

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I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas and New Year holiday. It’s time to jump right into the new year!  We’ve been talking about building our 2017 vision board, using the special core words and underlying principles we plan to live by this year.  Remember, the overall reason for spending so much time and brain power on building a vision board, is to create something we can focus on every day, that will help make us better people tomorrow than we are today.  The more people who share this frame of mind, the more strength and power we will be as a whole to make our world a better, safer, and more beautiful place to live in now, and create a sustainable, brighter place for our children and grandchildren to live in later.

As promised, today, to kick off the new year, I’m revealing my 2017 vision board. To recap, here are my core words.

  • Essentials: Do essential things only, let the rest go – focus on tasks that move the needle, don’t let the busy things detract me.
  • Presence: Be present with everyone in everything, in good and in uncomfortable situations – I will learn more about them and they will feel heard and understood.
  • Energy: Bring energy – it brings everything up and makes life more exciting for everyone.

As I think of these words coupled together with the principles I’ve identified that I need to focus on (that I wrote down) in the six areas of my life (Relationships, Spiritual Growth, Healthy & Fit, Career, Financial Stability, Intellectual Stimulation), I selected a wide variety of images. I love each one of them. So, here it is, my 2017 Vision Board!

I sincerely hope the very best for all of you in 2017!

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As we are quickly nearing the end of 2016, it’s a great time to reflect on the year’s successes.  Perhaps it’s the entrepreneur in me, but as soon as I recount my successes, I can’t help but focus on what I can do to make the coming year more fulfilling than the last. Most people look at the new year as a clean slate and start talking about their new year’s resolutions – what they will change, start, or stop doing in the new year.

In my book, Your Ultimate Life Vision, I talk about resolutions vs. goals. As Earnest Hemingway wisely said, “Never mistake motion for action.”  Some people talk about doing things differently, however those resolutions fade and nothing changes. The only way to make your plans stick, is to put together a written vision plan starting now, in December.  Don’t be confused, this is not a list of new year’s resolutions.  Your vision plan is meant to last a lifetime, but your resolutions will be distant memories by March, like your new gym membership.

In the January 2012 edition of InStyle magazine, the following readership poll results were published, listing the most popular new year’s resolutions.

  •             22% – Manage my money wisely and stick to a budget
  •             18% – Stress less
  •             10% – Read and improve my mind
  •              6% –  Spend more time with family and friends

Webster’s dictionary defines the word resolution as the act or process of resolving as: the act of analyzing a complex notion into a simpler one; the act of answering (solving); the act of determining. And it defines the word commitment as an agreement or pledge to do something in the future. Do you see the difference? Having a resolution is good in that you’ve identified specific things you want to do, or changes you want to make, however only when a commitment is made, will you move those plans forward and actually do them. Resolutions without a commitment are powerless and do nothing.

What are you REALLY going to change in 2017? What are you going to do to make yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally, healthier, build a career that allows you to become more financially stable so you can take care of yourself, your family, and give to those in need right next to us.

Never mistake motion for action.  Proverbs 14:23 says, “All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty.”  Don’t be a talker, be a doer, and make it happen!

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Recently, while listening to an interview with Jon Gordon speaking on teamwork and leadership, I was reminded that clear communication is THE important ingredient in building good relationships.  And good relationships are the foundation of healthy families, marriages, teams, and organizations.

John dissected communication in this way – good communication builds trust;  trust generates commitment; commitment fosters teamwork; and teamwork delivers results.  If one of these steps is missing it doesn’t work.  It all starts with communicating directly to the people we engage with (the root). Many organizations get off track by putting all the focus on ‘the fruit’, and stop tending to, or feeding ‘the root’.  If we only focus on the results, and not enjoy and engage in the process, we won’t bear good fruit.  Build your relationships and career with good communication, and you will harvest the best fruit possible.

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The Thanksgiving holiday is just two days away, and like everything else in life, it falls within the six areas of our lives. The two areas most effected, especially at this time of year, are relationships and spiritual connectedness. On Thanksgiving, we give ‘thanks’, but to who? For the past several years, my husband and I have hosted Thanksgiving dinner for 10 to 15 of our closest family and friends. Before the meal, as we share what is on our hearts, most often I hear thanks given to God for all the gifts bestowed – good health, a job, good career, a comfortable home, and not living in a cold snowy areal (ok, that’s because most of us grew up in a place like that). But more often, the most mentioned ‘thanks’ is for family and friends.  So, I’m offering three ways to say thanks to people who make a difference in your life.

1)        Tell people in person – Tell people face to face how they have impacted your life.  In this digital world, we live in, its easier to text or Facebook message people to tell them how we feel. Looking people in the eye and telling them, usually followed up by a hug, is the most powerful way to communicate.

2)        Call them – If you’re not physically able to meet with people, call them (Skype of Facetime even better).  Hearing someone’s voice is the next best thing to being with them in person.

 

3)        Write a note – Its best to tell people in person, or over the phone, however if for some reason that is not doable, perhaps it’s is a strained relationship, then write a note. A hand-written note is meaningful; however, we are in an instant messaging world, and trained to respond immediately to our incoming text tones. At the very least, sending a message of thanks and telling someone (even in a text message) how valuable they are to you, is a good thing.

With as many negative, scary, and painful things going on in this world, showing grace and love to as many people as possible is important and restorative. We need each other for good emotional and physical health.

Happy Thanksgiving to all!

I’ve been away from my blogs for a while to focus on building my CPCoastal business.  You can check it out at CPCoastal.com.  I have missed blogging about setting life visions and making dreams a reality, so I’m making a commitment to blog at least once a week. My hope is that I will provide insights and inspiration to everyone who reads them. With that, since we are in November, lets dive in.

When I first was introduced to making vision boards by my friend Lori, she told me every November she goes into her lab.  She explained her ‘lab’ was code for the time she intentionally sets aside, getting away from the normal daily routines and basically shutting the world out. It’s focused time she uses to concentrate on where and who she is and where and who she wants to be.  To be clear, she’s not looking to change her personality or passions; rather, she wants to make who she is even better. She starts her lab time by thinking about words that describe the elements of what she wants to be in the coming year.  For example: Challenge (challenge everyone who asks for my time to make sure I’m not wasting time with the wrong people doing unproductive things). Breakout (breakout of thinking I must do everything perfectly, sometimes good enough is good enough).

I adopted the tradition of going into the lab every November and picking meaningful words, and writing down how that word will impact my life in a positive way. At first it takes time learning to shut off everything around me to be quiet and listen to my inner self.  Words are powerful and give our mind something to work towards.  Pick words that move and inspire you to be something better tomorrow than  you were today.

After we pull our words together, we’ll focus on creating our 2017 vision board to support those very important words. I’m going into my lab this month and will share my words with you. Let’s do this together!  raw-6-29-13

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© 2019 Christine (Parrish) Barker and Your Ultimate Life Vision. All rights reserved. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this Blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Christine (Parrish) Barker and Your Ultimate Life Vision with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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